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its so hard not to give up!

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  • its so hard not to give up!

    My family has been emotionally, mentally and occassionally physically abusive for years. I grew up with temper tantrums when my parents don't get their way. I have always been put down. They call me horrible names, and say things that they know will hurt. Its affected my whole life. I've always had such low self confidence from it, and I'm really scared. How will I be in the real world? I turn 18 in february. I feel so messed up and so sad that it feels like life doesn't have anything to offer. There's days where I know they're wrong and its not okay, but its all in my mind. It h urts. My mom steals and sells my adhd medicine. I got a new prescripton for a different medicine because the other affected my tourettes and she's so mad at me. I feel pathetic. I'm overweight, I do things with guys that I know better than. I also have to have a screen for stds, and I'm scared to death of her finding out. I have never been more afraid of my parents hitting me. I'm scared and I don't know what to do. I want the most out of life but I'm trapped in my head. It really hurts.

  • #2
    Re: its so hard not to give up!

    Hello,
    Thanks for contacting the National Runaway Switchboard. It sounds like you’ve been dealing with a lot over the years. We’re very sorry to hear that you’ve been dealing with emotional, mental, and some physical abuse. No one deserves to be treated that way and it sounds like it really has been affecting your life. It sounds like you’ve had a lot of time to think about your situation and really are in touch with your feelings.

    It sounds like you’ve overcome a lot and although you say you are pathetic, it sounds like you are pretty resilient. You mentioned doing “things with guys than you know better than,” but are getting screened for STDs, so it sounds like you are trying to keep yourself safe. You might find the resource www.sexetc.org helpful. They have all kinds of information not only about sex, but relationships too.

    You mention you’ll be 18 next month; have you thought about any future plans for yourself? If you’d like help with anything like counseling, housing, or child abuse reporting, we can do our best to locate resources and help you through those options. You are more than welcome to contact us directly either by calling us 24/7 at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat (red button on our website) from 4:30 to 11:30pm Central Time.

    Stay safe and best of luck!
    -NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • #3
      Dont Give Up Its Not Worth It

      I was a teenager once and I know how it is to wanna just give up but u cant and u shouldnt as long as u believe in god and have faith u will make it everyone has hard times but u have to take it day by day and when u get older and look back u will realize everything happens for a reason!!!!!!!!

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Dont Give Up Its Not Worth It

        Hello,

        We thank you for your post. We appreciate you showing care and offering some words of encouragement to our posters. We are a confidential, anonymous and non-judgmental hotline but we are also very non-directive. We are not in a position to tell people what they ought to do directly. We offer options or alternatives for ways our posters and callers can survive if they choose to stay home or were to leave. We hope you understand because our post are not meant for blogging. We hope that if you ever need us yourself that you know we are here to help. Good luck

        -NRS
        Last edited by ccsmod8; 01-03-2012, 11:51 PM.
        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • #5
          I really appreciate the advice. I'm just so tired of feeling so horrible about myself. I don't know what to do when it feels like I've been trained to feel like less than nothing. I want to be happy. I try so hard. I feel out of place and unwelcome almost everywhere. I know I can't give up, but I don't know what to do. How do I make myself feel okay? Its like I am always worrying about everything. I don't think there's a second in the day where I'm not worried or sad about not being good enough. I take everything so personally. I want to be alright. Everyone wonders why I'm so jumpy and so emotional and get my feelings hurt so easily. No one understands, and I'm embarrassed to try to get them to.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: its so hard not to give up!

            Hello again,

            It sounds like you are dealing with a lot and are not in a very good place emotionally. We are here to listen, but unfortunately as we mentioned in our last post, our bulletin boards are not meant for ongoing communication/blogging. Also, since we are non-directive so aren’t really in a position to give advice, rather we’re here to try and help you through different options and hopefully come up with a plan. At this point we encourage you to contact us directly if you’d like to continue discussing your situation.

            Just a reminder, we can be reached 24/7 by calling us at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) and through our Live Chat (red button on our website) 4:30-11:30pm CST every day. We look forward to hearing from you!

            -NRS
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment

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