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I'm 18 and leaving, can my mom call the cops and report me missing?

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  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Hi, there!

    Thank you for reaching out. We’re here to listen, and here to help. First, congratulations on your pregnancy. It must be both an exciting and scary time for you. We are so sorry to hear that you have not received a warm congrats from your family. You do not deserve to be belittled and insulted. It is up to you and your boyfriend whether you want to keep your baby or not. It is certainly not your parents’ choice. It sounds like your boyfriend is supportive of you. It is good to know that you have some loved ones who care about you and your baby.

    In most states, the age of majority is 18. This is also true in North Carolina. See this link: http://statelaws.findlaw.com/north-c...ages-laws.html. If you were to leave, what were your plans? We are not legal experts, but we can connect you to people who are. You do not have to be confined at your parent’s house due to being pregnant. It seems like you feel a little lost due to being pregnant and having your family react like this. Please know that there are resources for youth who are pregnant. For example, there is the organization Planned Parenthood. They could connect you to resources and discuss your options with you. Their national number is 1-800-230-PLAN (1-800-230-7526). There is also a national pregnancy help line: 866-942-6466. Similarly, there are also teen parent programs and even shelters, if you did not have anywhere to go.

    As far as your parents, there are consent laws. The age of consent in your state is 16. Additionally, it is illegal for a person 18 or older to have sex with someone 16 or younger. Here is a page that talks about statutory rape laws in your state: http://www.criminaldefenselawyer.com...-rape-laws.htm.

    We invite you to chat or call us to be able to discuss your situation at length. We would be happy to listen and provide any individualized support. We know that at this time, you can feel afraid, upset, and alone. You deserve all the love and attention possible, especially since you are pregnant. We sincerely hope that you receive that! We wish you the absolute best of luck!

    Feel free to reach out again!

    Best,

    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    I was wondering if I could leave home at 18, I found out I was pregnant and they want me to have an abortion and never see the father of my child again what Can I do. I live in North Carolina. I got pregnant little days before I turned 18 and my mom wants to file in a rape charge for my boyfriend and I don't want that, she wants to keep me locked in my room because I am a whore according to her.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod15
    replied
    Re: I'm 18 and leaving, can my mom call the cops and report me missing?

    Hello,

    Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. You are very brave for reaching out to us in a time you feel you need our help. We are here to listen and support you.
    You mentioned that you want to move out of your house and that you are almost 18. It seems you have done your research as to the age of majority in your state as well as Puerto Rico which is a great start to helping you in your situation. Unless you are planning on running away to Puerto Rico you don’t have to worry about the age of majority there, the age of majority is specific to the state you want to live in.
    If you are planning on running away to Puerto Rico or want to leave your house before you turn 18, you should consider the fact that you are considered a minor by the state you are in. We are not legal experts here though so if you want to leave before you are 18 or move to Puerto Rico you should contact the non-emergency line of the local sheriff’s office in your town and the town you want to live in to see what would happen if you did decide to leave before you turned 18 or move somewhere where the age of majority is 21.
    Something you should consider too before you leave is if you have a plan for when you move out such as a place to live, a way to pay for things, ways to get to and from school, etc. It’s important to have a plan so you feel well supported if you move out.

    We hoped this helped and we encourage you to give us a call on our 24/7 hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) if you need further assistance. We wish you the best of luck moving forward.

    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Moving at 18

    Hello There!

    Im about to be 18 and i want to move out of my house. Majority age here in Atlanta is 18 but in Puerto Rico is 21. Could that be a problem?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod7
    replied
    Re: Re: I'm 18 and leaving, can my mom call the cops and report me missing?

    Hello there,

    Thank you so much for reaching out today. It sounds like your mom has been threatening to force you to stay in the house until you are 21 or she will get the law involved. That sounds really unfair, and typically she cannot legally do that.

    Typically, the legal age you can leave home without your mom’s permission is 18. Once you are 18, she cannot legally force you to stay home. You are allowed to live with your boyfriend and make your own life decisions. If you leave before you turn 18, your mom has the right to file a runaway report for you.

    That is also not okay that she is threatening to charge your boyfriend with raping you. You might look to see the consent laws in your state, to make sure she cannot try to charge your boyfriend with statutory rape. Generally, the age of consent is 17, but to make sure you might go to this link and click your state: http://sexetc.org/action-center/sex-in-the-states/.

    It sounds like you and your boyfriend are planning your future together. It sounds like a year ago he harmed you, but he hasn’t again and he has changed. We are happy to hear that you have been unharmed in the past year, and we also want to make sure that it stays that way. You do not deserve to be hurt, you deserve to be in a healthy relationship. You might look at www.loveisrespect.com to make sure that your relationship is healthy, and to find resources if it is not.

    We strongly encourage you to call or chat us if you would like to go over your situation and help with brainstorming your options. We can also provide you with local resources such as legal aid if you need it.

    Best of luck,

    -NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Re: I'm 18 and leaving, can my mom call the cops and report me missing?

    im about to turn 17 on december and im planning to leave with my boyfriend as soon as im 18 but im scared cause of my mother she
    tells me that if i live the house that she going to call the laws on me and that when she finds me she was going to hit me and
    that ima have to live when im 21 and if i go with my boyfriend she was going to call the laws on him saying that he raped me whenever
    thats a lie and im really scare because me and my boyfriend already been planning everything and talk about our future and right
    now my boyfriend is 18 . he had lay a hand on me a year ago cause he has anger issues but he promise me he wont ever do it again
    and he havent done it at all and he doesnt have anger issues anymore at all cause he went with a doctor and all that and my mother
    seperated us and im planning to live with him till im 18

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod10
    replied
    Re: I'm 18 and leaving, can my mom call the cops and report me missing?

    Hello There!

    Thanks for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. It sounds like you are going through a lot at home right now. You are doing so well with staying strong and trying to plan for your future.
    Our forum is a great way for many youth in situation s like yours to find some helpful information. Often times our responses are realevent to other post. Here is a reply from NRS that could be very helpful to you.

    Originally posted by ccsmod3 View Post
    We are not legal experts; however, our understanding is most states recognize the age of majority/legal adulthood as 18. In some areas there is still an expectation of a parent/guardian to provide their adult child with a place to live until they finish high school. However, if you are recognized as a legal adult, then you will likely be able to move out should you choose. For additional or more specific information, an option can be to call out to your local non-emergency number for your police or sheriff’s department.

    If you want to talk more about what you are going through, please call us or live chat.
    Best Wishes,
    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Re: I'm 18 and leaving, can my mom call the cops and report me missing?

    i have a certain friens currently residing in north carolina and she is 19 and i told my mom,and step mom
    that i wasnt happy here anymore because of all the put downs and i told them i was leaving then they replied by saying the
    only way im laving this house is when im in a body bag if i leave on december 26th could they call the cops on me and im 18

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod3
    replied
    Re: I'm 18 and leaving, can my mom call the cops and report me missing?

    Hello and thanks for reaching out on our forum. It sounds like you’re dealing with a difficult situation with your mom and you’re at a breaking point. We are not legal experts; however, our understanding is most states recognize the age of majority/legal adulthood as 18. In some areas there is still an expectation of a parent/guardian to provide their adult child with a place to live until they finish high school. However, if you are recognized as a legal adult, then you will likely be able to move out should you choose. For additional information, we can provide you with the local non-emergency number for your police or sheriff’s department if we know where in Indiana you’re located.

    As far as your plan, it sounds like you are going to move in with your friend after you turn 18. You mentioned finishing school and having a job and money which is good. Other things you might need to consider are transportation, insurance (such as car or medical), and financial aid if you plan on applying to college after high school. We’d be happy to talk to you further about your plan and encourage you to try out our Live Chat which opens today starting at 4:30pm CST. Best of luck!

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    Re: I'm 18 and leaving, can my mom call the cops and report me missing?

    Hello, I am 17 years old and I will be 18 in exactly one month. I live in Indiana, and everyone tells me that is is legal for me to move out at 18. However, my mom told me that the legal age is 19 in Indiana.(Which I do not believe) She just wants me to stay until I graduate High School but she is pushing me to my breaking point. She treats me like im 10 years old, she is always so rude to both me and my brother. She tries to make my decisions on who I date, she never lets me decide for myself. She always grounds me for the stupidest reasons and she always assumes that she is right and will not listen to anyone else. My grandma, which is my moms mom, has even talked with me and said that she wouldn't blame me for moving out when i turn 18. She said that she would have my back if i make the decision to move. But i am worried that my mom will freak out and try to find me and threaten me. I plan to move in with my friend, and finish school. I have a job and money, so none of that is an issue for me. What should I do?

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod4
    replied
    Moving Out

    Hello,
    Thanks for contacting the national Runaway Safeline.

    In most states at eighteen an individual is considered to be an adult and legally free to make there own decisions.
    If you have any more questions or would like other information about your situation you are welcome to contact 1-800-Runaway (786-2929) to talk more about your situation.

    Take Care,
    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    moving out

    I am 18 and I want to go live with a friend's mom and I don't want my parents to call the police

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod9
    replied
    RE: i'm 18, can my grandma nor aunt call the cops on me?

    Hello There,
    Thanks for reaching out to the National Runaway Safeline.

    We’re so sorry to hear about this fight with your family. It sounds like it was really bad. We’re glad you came to us tonight and we want to commend you on your bravery for coming to us and sharing this story. That took a lot of courage.

    We’re not legal experts here, but typically 18 is the age of majority for most states. However, there’s a few states that do have higher ages. You can check for sure here: http://sexetc.org/action-center/sex-in-the-states/

    If they’re telling you to leave and say they’ll file a runaway report to get you home AND your state has an age higher than 18 years old being the age of majority, technically they COULD TRY to file a runaway report with the police. However, the police would only be able to make you return home if they even accept the report (sometimes when you’re really close to being an adult they will not). If you’re being kicked out and you’re not yet considered an adult in your state, you have the right to call the police and report that your family has kicked you out. However, we completely understand if you’re not comfortable doing this as it would come down to your word against your family’s if the police chose to investigate. However, if you believe they attacked you then that is certainly something you have the legal right to report as well.

    It sounds like you have a really supportive boyfriend and a way to financially look after yourself if it comes down to you living outside of your home. We’re so glad to hear that.

    This whole situation sounds really frustrating. If you’d like, we could help you call the police and talk to them directly. Since we’re not legal experts, everything we said is to be taken generally, we’re not able to speak with certainty about the law. The police typically decide these types of matter but their policy can change from city to city. All you’d have to do is call here at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) and let someone know about your situation and that you’d like to call the police and we’d be happy to help. You can always call just to talk to someone to explore your situation further and see if there’s any other way we can help.

    Best of luck,
    NRS

    Leave a comment:


  • Guest's Avatar
    Guest replied
    i'm 18, can my grandma nor aunt call the cops on me?

    Hi, I'm 18. my family & I had a REALLY, REALLY, BAD FIGHT. it turned into a physically/ verbally fight. My grandma said (walking towards the door & opening it) GET OUT. (at least 3-5 times) & they said they could file a run away report. can they really do that ? after the fact they said for me to leave & never come back ? PLEASE ANSWER ME ASAP. My boyfriend & I already have a place of mind where to go. it's close by where i can still go to my high school (i'm a senior but i'm 1 i have a job. i get paid every week. So i do have money on my debit card.

    Leave a comment:


  • ccsmod8
    replied
    RE: My mom took away my id's

    Hello there –

    Thank you for reaching to us here at the National Runaway Safeline. We are always here to listen and here to help in any way that we can. We hope that by helping you on our public forum that others that might be in similar situations, can read through and find our reply helpful. Sounds like you have a very specific question that you wanted to ask.

    From reading through your post here, it sounds like you’re in a very difficult position right now. It can be frustrating to have something that belongs to you be taken away from you just because your mother doesn’t agree to what you want to do. Just so you know, since you are over the age of 18 years old your mother can’t really stop you from leaving home. If you wanted to move out you can do so and she wouldn’t be able to call the police or anything like that. The only time that they might actually do something is if you are planning on take something that she owns or still pays for (i.e car). Other than that she doesn’t have the right to hold you there.

    If your mother has already taken you ID away from you that does make it really hard for someone to leave because you do need your identification for several things. Things like traveling, checking in anywhere, or even getting a job. You might be able to contact local law enforcement to help you retrieve your ID and other things that belong to you. Other options that you might be able to reach out to a homeless youth shelters that help youth get IDs or that you can reapply for another one.

    Now this is not something that we normally deal with, so our knowledge on the subject is very limited. Each state has its own set of rules and fees for ordering certified birth certificate and other records. Rules, ordering instructions and fees for all 50 states, the District of Columbia and all other U.S states can be found here (http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/w2w.htm). Perhaps you can get in touch with your local county clerk’s office and they might be able to tell you a more solid answer on what is acceptable to obtain your birth certificate, social security card, and/or ID. Sometime according to the Department of Health’s Office of Vital Records website it looks like a sibling or grandparent could request your birth certificate if neither parent is an option. This depends on which city and state you are from, so trying looking up the Department of Health’s Office of Vital Records for your state.

    If you give us a call on our 24/7 hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) we could help you find resources in your area and could potentially help you brainstorm a possible solution to the issues you are having. We would love to talk to you about what has been going on recently that is making you want to leave home. We also have an online chat service available every day.

    Hope this information helps!

    Leave a comment:

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