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I'm 18 and leaving, can my mom call the cops and report me missing?

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  • Hi there,

    Thank you for reaching out to us at the National Runaway Safeline. We're sorry to hear about all that has been going on and want you to know that you do deserve to feel safe and happy in your home. We understand that it takes a great deal of courage to seek help. You mentioned experiencing emotional abuse which may be reportable against your parents. Please keep in mind you by no means deserve any type of abuse, emotional or otherwise. That said, we can’t be 100% sure what the outcome will be if your local CPS decides to open a case based on what you share. Sometimes CPS decides to remove minors from the home and other times they offer services such as family counseling or mediation instead. The only way to know the outcome might be to reach out to them directly and if you’re ready to do that we are here to help you through that process. Reaching out to Child Help USA at (1-800-422-4453) or www.childhelp.org may help to get a better understanding of what may happen before and after a report is made. They also would be able to talk to you about the possibility of having custody transferred to someone else.

    It sounds like you are unsure of who to turn to but also are thinking of talking more to someone at school. You have the right to decide when enough is enough and to decide that you want something better for yourself. Talking to a guidance counselor or other adults in your life that you trust can help you walk through your options and figure out what would be best for you. We are also here 24/7 at 1-800-786-2929 if you ever need someone to talk to or need help identifying the people in your life that you can talk to. Don't hesitate to reach out to us or Child Help for help.

    Stay safe,

    NRS

    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

    Tell us what you think about your experience!
    https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

    Comment


    • I’m 17 and I’ll be 18 in December and I wanna move out. I live in Georgia.

      I wanna move out and live with my boyfriend and his parents. Me and him are engaged but my pawpaw didn’t give us permission. After I’m 18 I still have school left and my parents told me that they would take me out of school, are they allowed to do that? My boyfriend parents do more for me then mine do. They don’t care about me they just use me as a maid. They don’t take me or pick me up from work. They don’t buy me clothes or shoes. I don’t have a tv or even a heater in my room. Is there anyway I can leave before I’m 18??

      Comment


      • ccsmod10
        ccsmod10 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi there,

        Thanks for contacting National Runaway Safeline. It seems you are dealing with quite an unfortunate situation. It seems like a difficult thing to go through to not feel supported and assisted by your parents. Your boyfriend’s parents, however, seem to care quite a bit and were very nice to allow you and your boyfriend to live with them. To answer your question, we are not legal experts here at NRS but by utilizing some resources we are able to inform that according to Georgia law, you are not considered an adult until 18. Due to this some of the decisions you make can still be affected by your parents. However, if your parents force you to not go to school, as a minor, and do not allow you to be able to get a proper education, there could be a risk of truancy. This means that parents who do not provide the basic needs for their children including access to education can face legal consequences. However, once you are 18 and legally an adult, your parents cannot legally take you out of school. Your current age could come into play with you moving as well. As mentioned before, at 17, in Georgia you are still considered a minor. However, if you would like to further explore your legal rights and get information about this matter, you can contact a legal service in Georgia. Hopefully, this information can be of assistance to you. If you would like to talk with us further feel free to give us a call at 1800-RUNAWAY or chat with us live by visiting 1800runaway.org.

    • Hi I live in Texas and am 18. My parents keep taking away my personal belongings and I want to leave but they threaten to call the police on me all the time. I don't know what to do anymore and I feel like I am suffocating, and its not the fact that I hate rules, I just think that they haven't been able to keep an open mind to me being bisexual. I am crying right now as I am writing this because I am so confused as to what to do. I dont have a job and I dont have a place to go, I dont have a friends house to run to I'm alone. Please, is there anything I can do or anywhere I could go?

      Comment


      • ccsmod5
        ccsmod5 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi,
        Thank you for reaching out. It sounds like things are really stressful at home right now. It is awful to feel like your parents are suffocating you because they can’t accept your sexuality. That is incredibly hurtful. Your parents are supposed to love and support you for the person you are rather than who they wish you would be. It’s understandable that you feel upset and that you’d want to get out of there. You absolutely deserve to be somewhere you feel loved and supported. Since you are 18, you are able to leave home without permission. A really great option could be a transitional living program (TLP) if there is one in your area. TLPs are programs that provide housing for up to 18 months and are designed to help young adults get on their feet financially and socially. If you need help finding a TLP near you, feel free to give us a call at 1-800-786-2929.
        You mention that you’re bisexual. It can be really difficult when your family isn’t accepting of that. If you ever need support, there are some really excellent resources for the LGBT community. We’ve listed those below. We want you to know that you are not alone and while things are overwhelming right now, it will not always feel this way. You are perfect just the way you are and there are so many people out there who will love and support you.
        LGBT National Hotline: 1-800-843-4564
        LGBT National Youth Talkline: 1-800-246-7743
        Stay safe,
        NRS

    • I live in North Carolina. My birthday is February 16th. I'll be 18 on that day. I've been having trouble at home with my mom and stepdad. We've been arguing a lot lately and I'm tired of the arguing all the time. I have a boyfriend that is about the be 21 and he still lives with his mother and son, we've been together 2 years now and he's also seen what I go through. He said he's sure his mom wouldn't mind me living with them. I love my mom don't get me wrong. I may just need a break but I'm tired of arguing and having disagreements all the time. I just wanted to know if its fine to leave when I turn 18 and there be no issues with the law coming to get me? Because my mom has said shell call the cops on me if I tried to leave.

      Comment


      • ccsmod0
        ccsmod0 commented
        Editing a comment
        Hi, thanks for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline. It must be difficult to be going through the current issues you are having with your mother and it is understandable to love your mother but feel you need a break from her. At 17, you are still considered a minor and depending on the leniency or strictness of authorities with certain laws being enforced in your state, there could be a number of outcomes if you decide to leave home and live elsewhere, such as with your boyfriend and his family, without your mother’s approval. At your age, you are still, by law, a minor and required to have an adult responsible for you as well as your whereabouts. In your case that would be your mother/parents. If you leave the home without your mother’s consent then, she is able to call authorities and potentially file a runaway report if you are refusing to come back home. There is the possibility of you having to return home or discuss an alternate living situation with your mother that she will consent to. There is also the option for your mother to file what is called harboring a runaway against the adults you are living with which basically means that there could be legal consequences for them, if your mother chooses to pursue that charge. It is a lengthy process so, due to your age and the fact that you will be 18 soon, it is likely that charge would be something your mother would pursue but, it is an option for her. Legally, it is not illegal to leave your home. You would not be arrested or charged with a crime for leaving your home. If that is something you feel like is best for you, it is always best to have a clear and secure plan. As always, we are here to assist and would love to speak with you further. Feel free to give us a call at our 24 hour hotline 1800-RUNAWAY or chat with is live anytime by visiting our website 1800runaway.org.

    • My fiance wants to move out of her mom's house can she in NY?

      Comment


      • Reply:My fiance wants to move

        Hi there,
        Thank you for writing to us here at National Runaway Safeline (NRS).

        We understand it takes great courage to reach out, and we appreciate you sharing a little bit about what’s going on. It sounds like your fiancé may want to leave home and you would like to know some information on runaway laws.
        While we are not experts on the law, 18 is generally the age that an individual may leave home without parent permission. If you are under 18 and leave home, a parent/guardian may file a runaway report and the person may be returned home. Also, those they stay with may run the risk of being charged with harboring a runaway. For more specifics on the law, the local non-emergency police or legal aid may better answer legal questions.

        We are here as support to help through this challenging time. We can best help by phone or chat as NRS is unable to respond more than twice by email to assist you. If you would like to talk more in detail please call or chat soon.
        Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).
        If you are at risk of any danger or feeling unsafe, we encourage you to reach out to 911 or seek emergency assistance immediately.

        Be safe,
        NRS

        We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us

        Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

        National Runaway Safeline
        [email protected] (Crisis Email)
        1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

        Tell us what you think about your experience!
        https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

        Comment


        • Hello. I am a 17 year old woman, and in the state of Missouri, I am considered a legal adult. Things are stressful and bad for me at home. I have picture evidence of bruises but I do not want dfs called because of my sister's. I can't take much more of the stress and I tried leaving the house once, however, my mom wouldn't give me my phone and car keys (even though I pay the insurance and I paid for the car but her name is on the title so I can have insurance and my Gma pays for my phone) therefore she tried setting me up for fsilure so I thought I needed to go back because in the long run it would be better. Now I'm at the point that I need to leave. She has already threatened to put a restraining order on a guy that I'm talking to as well and I don't want him getting into trouble as he came to this town for a better life. Is it possible to have an officer escort me out with my stuff? I have multiple places to go, but I want to make sure I have my phone and car as I need those for work, for my duties in the military, for school, etc. Please help asap.
          ​asap.

          Comment


          • ccsmod15
            ccsmod15 commented
            Editing a comment
            Hi there,

            Thank you for contacting us at the National Runaway Safeline. It takes great courage to reach out for help and we are glad that you decided to reach out for help.


            We are sorry to hear that you are going through such a hard time. You don't deserve to go through this. If your safety is ever at risk you can call 911. This situation is not complicated and we are not legal experts. However if it might be an option for you to file an abuse report you do have the option to do that. While it seems like you are concerned about not filing a report because of your sister's it can be helpful to think about if how they might stay after you were to leave. If they are going through abuse as well you can consider filing an abuse report. Before you leave home it can be helpful to think about where you might stay, how you might pay for food, rent or other living expenses. Since we are not legal experts it can be helpful to contact www.lawhelp.org for any legal aid resources.

            You can call us at our 24 hour confidential hotline at 1-800-RUNAWAY(786-2929) and we would be happy to listen to you, explore your options and provide any resources.

            You are doing great by reaching out for help. We wish you the best and hope to hear from you soon.

            Best,

            NRS

        • Hello I’m 18 I’m so tired of living with my parents my mom said I’m not allowed to leave until I graduate I pay bills and I was wondering if I leave could she call the cops? What would happen if she did? And can I leave?

          Comment


          • ccsmod9
            ccsmod9 commented
            Editing a comment
            Since you are 18 you are more than likely considered a legal adult which means that you can move out if you want to and you won’t be considered a runaway. As a legal adult, you have a right to make your own decisions about where you live. We can help you make a plan for how to deal with your situation and help you find resources to land on your feet. Having a plan for where you will live and how you will survive once you move out can be very helpful. Moving can be a huge step, and you don’t have to be alone. Some steps you can take towards independence might be to find employment if you don’t have an income, or to save up money for moving expenses. It can also be helpful to research rents in your area, find a roommate, or make a budget. Another thing you might want to consider is what kinds of things you depend on your parents for currently such as tuition expenses for school, or health insurance, and whether they would continue to provide those things after you leave. There may be social service agencies in your area that can help meet some of these needs, such as Transitional Living Programs, a kind of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. We are here to listen and help however we can.

        • I moved out of my mom's house when i was18 and she never called the cops on me. so now since i am 35 people don't think i wouldn't live in the south and thats not true. i am older enough to make my own choices like everyone else. so it's not against the law if you want to move out and live anywhere.

          Comment


          • ccsmod3
            ccsmod3 commented
            Editing a comment
            Thanks for reaching out to National Runaway Safeline. Once you are 18 (or age of majority in your state, you are able to move out legally and their is nothing that the police can to bring you back home. In some cases there are time when a parent files for extended custody which changes that ability, but we don't hear this very often. We are here for you and will support you in anyway that we can. Please feel free to call into us directly as we can talk further about your situation and find resources that are best for you in your area. Our hotline ( 1-800-RUNAWAY) and chat are open 24/7.

        • can my parents legally keep me home when I turn 18 and want to go out without them threatening to ground me or such

          Comment


          • ccsmod9
            ccsmod9 commented
            Editing a comment
            Since you are 18 you are more than likely considered a legal adult which means that you can move out if you want to and you won’t be considered a runaway. As a legal adult, you have a right to make your own decisions about where you live. We can help you make a plan for how to deal with your situation and help you find resources to land on your feet. Having a plan for where you will live and how you will survive once you move out can be very helpful. Moving can be a huge step, and you don’t have to be alone. Some steps you can take towards independence might be to find employment if you don’t have an income, or to save up money for moving expenses. It can also be helpful to research rents in your area, find a roommate, or make a budget. Another thing you might want to consider is what kinds of things you depend on your parents for currently such as tuition expenses for school, or health insurance, and whether they would continue to provide those things after you leave. There may be social service agencies in your area that can help meet some of these needs, such as Transitional Living Programs, a kind of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. We are here to listen and help however we can.

        • I’m 21 and I’m planning on leaving my house I have a sexual abusive step father but nobody knows except me and him. I haven’t told my mom and I don’t want to I just want to leave and I was wondering if I left would they call the police or file a missing person. Everyone treats me like I’m literally nothing in this house and I can’t take it anymore.

          Comment


          • ccsmod5
            ccsmod5 commented
            Editing a comment
            Thank you for writing to NRS. It sounds like things are outstandingly difficult at home, and we appreciate you contact us for advice. Since you are 21, they cannot file a runaway or missing person report to tell your parents where you are or bring you home. If you would like additional information, you could contact a legal aid service to talk to a lawyer for free. Another resource you could think about talking to would be RAINN (Rape, Abuse, Incest, National Network) at 1 800 656 4673. If you would like to talk to us further, we can be reached via our online chat or via phone at 1-800-RUNAWAY

        • I am 18 years old and my parents won't let me move out, get a job, and they won't let me go anywhere or talk to anyone.. They take my phone and hide it from me. I want to move in with my friend but they don't like her so they'd flip a lid.. My mom said she'd call the police if I left.. Do they have the right to do any of this?

          Comment


          • Reply: I am 18 years old and my parents


            Hello,
            Thank you for writing to us here at the National Runaway Safeline.

            Since you are 18 you are more than likely considered a legal adult which means that you can move out if you want to and you won’t be considered a runaway.
            As a legal adult, you have a right to make your own decisions about where you live. We can help you make a plan for how to deal with your situation and help you find resources to land on your feet.
            Having a plan for where you will live and how you will survive once you move out can be very helpful. Moving can be a huge step, and you don’t have to be alone.
            Some steps you can take towards independence might be to find employment if you don’t have an income, or to save up money for moving expenses.
            It can also be helpful to research rents in your area, find a roommate, or make a budget.

            Another thing you might want to consider is what kinds of things you depend on your parents for currently such as tuition expenses for school, or health insurance, and whether they would continue to provide those things after you leave. There may be social service agencies in your area that can help meet some of these needs, such as Transitional Living Programs, a kind of shelter where young adults can live and get services to help them transition to independent living. We are here to listen and help however we can.
            If you would like to talk more in detail and share more about how we can help specifically, please call or chat soon.

            Our contact information is 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929); www.1800runaway.org (click on the chat button).

            Take care,
            NRS

            We hope this response was helpful! We’d love to hear from you about your experience using our crisis email/forum. Your feedback plays an important role in helping us improve our services to youth and families. Please click the link to fill out our survey: Your Opinion Matters to Us
            Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

            National Runaway Safeline
            [email protected] (Crisis Email)
            1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

            Tell us what you think about your experience!
            https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/YourOpinionMattersToUs

            Comment


            • Im 18 and want to stay with a nearby friend because my mom’s third husband, my stepfather, is toxic and always compares me to his youngest “prodigy” chuld who is younger then me. I want to finish school first but i dont want to live or be near that man.

              Comment


              • ccsmod7
                ccsmod7 commented
                Editing a comment
                Hi there! Thanks for reaching out today, sounds like you are pretty done with living with your stepfather who unfairly compares you to his child. That sounds pretty hard to handle.

                18 years old is generally the legal age youth become adults and can make their own life decisions including where they live. So generally you cannot be listed as a runaway at 18, and you can live with your friend. That is great that you have a nearby friend that you can rely on. You might also think about the other things you will need to when moving out of your parent's house to support yourself such as finances, vital documents, transportation, and all of your basic needs.

                Please do not hesitate to call or chat us if you would like to go over your plan to move or if you have any other questions. We are always here for you.

                Best,

                NRS

            • I’m a 17yr old girl turning 18 in December can I leave once I’m 18 in the state of Massachusetts. My mom says that if I leave she will call the cops on me but I have reasons why I want to make this choice. If I explain the cops why I’m making this decision will they understand and let me go? I was also planning to stay with my grandparents until I get a job and go rent a studio. But the other problem is she also says that if I move with them she will stop talking to them because of my fault. I have explained to her my reasons but she doesn’t care. I don’t even have a phone or am allowed to work or be with my friends. I get a lot of anxiety attacks at night bc of this. I feel lonely and sometimes I feel like my head going to explote. I’m tired of this 4 years feeling like this.

              Comment

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