Physical Abuse

[yuki]

I am currently 18 years of age. I've been physically abused by my dad since childhood. I've gone through depression to cutting myself to suicidal thoughts. I don't want to have any relationship with my dad at all. I currently live in the suburbs of San Francisco and is planning on moving out. The only problem is I have no money and no place to stay. I don't want to call the cops on my dad because I know he has diabetes and kidney problems. But at the same time I'm terrified of living here. He can snap at any moment and start beating me up. I've called the police on him once a few years back, but he got off with a warning. I don't want to put him in jail or anything because, after all, he is my biological father and has provided for my living expenses.

Recently, I've been thinking about joining the Air Force but at the same time I'm scared. I want to be able to depend on myself and have financial freedom without my parents help. I don't know what to do. I'm terribly lost. But one thing for sure is that I need to get out of this household. I'm sick and tired of crying every night, praying to god, for someone to come help me. I don't want to have nightmares of my dad beating me up in the hallway anymore. I just want to live by myself. I have a job, but I only get 8 dollar an hour and I only work 3 days a week. I'm also taking classes at a community college and I fear that if i move out, I won't have the time or money to take classes. It seems that the best option for me is to join the military.

Is joining the air force in order to get out of my abusive household and gain financial freedom a good idea? Is there any other ways or programs out there that can help me with my situation?

[ccsmod0]

Physical Abuse

Hi,
Thank you for contacting us at the National Runaway Switchboard. It sounds like you are a very strong person and that you have been and currently are going through alot of difficult experiences. We are glad that you are reaching out for help from us. We cannot tell you what would be best, only you can know this. If the air force is something you are really interested in it is up to you to make that decision. Hopefully you can gain as much knowledge as possible about it before you make any decisions. You can make a list of pros and cons to help you decide and there are alot of resources on the internet to give you more information if you feel you want it.

As for leaving the house and trying to make it on your own...of course this can be hard, and it must be scary to think about leaving and being independent for the first time. It sounds great that you want to stay in school and that you are trying very hard by working. There is something called a Transitional Living Program that may be of interest to you. This is like a long term shelter that can help you learn to live independently. Not everyone can get into these programs but San Francisco may have quite a few to look at. We can give you a couple to try for now;

Community Youth Center - (415) 775-2636
Larkin Street Youth Services - (415) 673-0911 or the 24 hour hotline number : (800) 447-8223

There may be more outside of San Francisco as well as some more in San Francisco depending on where you would like to be. If you can call us here at 1-800-RUNAWAY we would be more than happy to try and help you if these don't work. There are also quite a bit of resources available to you for being a survivor of child abuse. One that is available if you are interested is the Safe Horizon’s Domestic Violence Hotline at 800.621.HOPE (4673). There are also support groups available and counseling if you feel you want to talk to someone about how this has effected you.

If you are ever feeling threatened or in danger, you can always call 911. If you want to get out of the house even temporarily there are emergency shelters that we can try and help you find. We are anonymous and confidential, and we are free from any payphone. Please don't hesitate to call us as we are here to help you.

Good luck to you and stay safe,

NRS
1-800-RUNAWAY

[Unregistered]

Answer To Your Dilemma

I was in the Air Force and worked on B-52 Bombers at Castle AFB in California. The Air Force has a program called "Community College of The Air Force" geared toward enlisted personell. You can get your degree through them. This would be one of the cheapest ways to do it. Find a recruiter where you live and talk to him or her.

[ccsmod1]

Answer to Your Dilemma

Thank you for reading and posting to our bulletins here at the National Runaway Switchboard. We appreciate your comments and hope you are doing well. If you ever find yourself in a crisis feel free to call us here at 1-800-RUNAWAY. We are here 24/7 and are confidential and anonymous.
NRS