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Too much for someone my age

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  • Too much for someone my age

    Well Im 20 yrs. old. I havent had exactly the "perfect" childhood or growing up years. Since I was 4 yrs. old I had been molested and beaten. I dealt with that all the way to 14 yrs. old. Even after he (blood father) got kicked out for doing all that I was just completly messed up, my Mom didnt believe me at the time so when I felt like I didnt have her by my ide I went bad. I got into the gang life, drank, did drugs, and hung out with the wrong crowds to where I got into mess that was out of my hands.
    Eventually time passed by, thrapy classes were attended and I started getting my act together and thought to myself, "I made a promise to my Mom since I was a little girl that I WILL be th one to take care of her and Im keeping that promise!!!". So, I busted my butt to get my grades back on track,graduated and joined the U.S. Army. Still to this day Im in.
    Even though Im living what I promised by takin care of the bills and everything fr my Mom, Im very far away from home, and more crap is hitting the fan!
    Not only was I molested but my younger sisters were too. The youngest one turned out fine but the middle one who is 16 yrs.old is too much! For some reason ever since I left for the army she started actin up badly! I didnt like what she was doing and we lost our relationship. I havent really spoken to her for over 2 years now. I use to in the beginning but it would be just yelling at her telling her she needs to get her act together and her telling me its her life.
    Now, she has taken off and she has been missing for 16 days now. I dont want to think negative but Im getting a bad feeling something worse has happened because 16 days is too long.
    My Mom is seriously on the edge right now because shes been through so much with her kids being taken and her fightin to get them back then finally getting them back and doing her best to raise them on her own. And when she calls me crying her heart out, saying she feels alone, and how much it hurts that my sister tells her she hates her and all the negativity, it seriously kills me!!!!
    Im out here puttin my life on the line to take care of them including my sister even though we dont talk and I just feel so helpless that Im not out there with my Mom.
    Im only 20, taking care of my Mom and sisters, my own family, and trying to stay alive. I dont understand why everything falls under my care but I try to keep strong for them but inside Im losing this fight. I just need help!

    ~ (Name edited due to confidentiality.)

  • #2
    Thank you for sharing you story with us. It sounds like even though you have dealt with a lot in your life, you have persevered and become the caregiver of your family. It sounds like you were able to deal with the issues of molestation, drinking, drugs, gang activity, etc. through therapy classes. We congratulate you on graduating high school, joining the army, and providing for your mom and sisters.

    We are sorry to hear that your 16 year-old sister is missing. It sounds like her past behavior and choices have caused a strain on your relationship, although you are still concerned about her well-being. It also sounds like the whole situation has been stressful on both you and your mom. We are not sure if she has already filed a missing juvenile or runaway report yet, but if not that could be an option. These reports are generally filed through the local police or sheriff’s department by calling the non-emergency line. We’ve also provided some missing children’s hotlines that might be helpful below.

    Missing Children’s Hotlines
    - They offer missing children registries, referrals to law enforcement, and can help with posters/ and flyers.
    National Center for Missing and Exploitive Children (NCMEC): 1-800-THE-LOST

    Operation Lookout: 1-800-782-7335

    Polly Klaas Foundation: 1-800-587-4357

    Team Hope
    - They match parents/guardians one-on-one to another parents/guardians who have experienced a missing child or youth.
    Help families in crisis with a missing, sexually exploited or recovered child as they handle the day-to-day issues of coping and/or searching for their child. Help provide peer support, emotional support, compassion, coping tools, empowerment and resources to families with missing, sexually exploited and recovered children.

    We hope this helps and you are welcome to call us at 1-800-RUNAWAY if there is anything else we can do. We’re anonymous, confidential, and available 24/7.
    Best of luck, NRS
    Please remember you can reach us directly by calling our 24 hour hotline, 1-800-RUNAWAY (786-2929) or through our Live Chat.

    National Runaway Safeline
    [email protected] (Crisis Email)
    1-800-RUNAWAY (24 Hour Hotline)

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